Log in

No account? Create an account
Onmyou Seijuu
The Black & White Bear
October 2008

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-10-16 11:19
Subject: Transcript for last video post.
Security: Public
So, I said a long time ago in my first video post that I was thinking about retiring Boogiepanda as an online identity. I've been using the name for almost a decade now, there is a lot of baggage associated with it. I tried for a while to move it into the realm of being my "personal life" online identity while developing a separate "professional life" persona, but it just doesn't fit my personality.

Some people go to work, and for the most part leave their personal life at home. Then the go home and leave the work mind-set completely. Some people do it to varying degrees, but for the most part I'm always projecting the same persona. I think 7-8 years ago, that wasn't really the case. There were huge parts of my personal life that I omitted from my interactions at work. Despite the fact that I liked the people I was working with, there was not a deep interpersonal bond. I did develop that kind of relationship with my direct boss over time, but most of my other coworkers were more of a friendly cohabitational relationship.

Boogiepanda was a retreat. It started off as an innocuous enough instant messenger handle, but over time it expanded like a tree taking root. The name originated from two characters.

The first was the father of Ranma from the Ranma 1/2. For those unfamiliar with the show, it is a cartoon where the main character falls under a curse where when slashed with water, he changes gender. Other characters in the show suffer similar curses, his father turns into a Panda, his nemesis turns into a pig, and so forth. The reference to this character is primarily superficial, as he turns into a panda and I happen to like pandas.

The second character was Boogiepop from a "light novel" series and anime of the same name. The reference to this character is a little more involved and intentional. Boogiepop (the character) represents a lot of themes I identify with. Boogiepop himself is an alter ego that only surfaces when needed.

I don't doubt the importance of layered personality in human society. Our ability to learn, and adapt behavior to match the social environment is probably one of our most advantageous evolutions along side a heightened sense of individualism. Behavior and personality are different, but interrelated. Personality is an observation of motivational, through, and behavioral patterns. It is part of the natural human tendency to assign meaning. We assign personality to others based on our perception of them. We also try to affect the perception others have of us.

So Boogiepanda, a created online identity is smoke and mirrors. It isn't all the different from the "hats" metaphor used to describe how people adapt to filling multiple, sometimes conflicting roles in their life. I've explored that method, I want to try something different. Let's take away the smoke and mirrors.

If I had such a horrible job that I needed that psychological separation, I think I'd prefer to just change jobs. The hat metaphor is useful, but as I've learned from experience in my job it isn't productive to try to section off different aspects of any role. I am staunchly against that. It is much more effective to integrate learning and methods across roles.

There is definitely a time and a place for Boogiepanda, he's not getting the axe so to speak. I am going to focus on driving more online interaction through another more transparent online identity.

So one of the projects I am working on is a sort of CMS for my primary site at the www4.ncsu.edu site. If you're familiar with that particular part of NC State technological history you might think, "How can you make a CMS on a web host that doesn't support server side dynamic scripts?" That is entirely the point! My aim is to make a browser based CMS. Clearly the part of the CMS that stores content will have to be server side, and that will be hosted on the people.engr.ncsu.edu site, but every other layer will be client side.

In addition to making a dynamic site on a static server, I'm going to focus on integrating different parts of my life experience together. I'll continue to use Livejournal, but on a new account: BornDigital. I'll also continue to build out Fabulous IT which is hosted on our University Library blogs. The final major piece of the puzzle is the questionably reverent Stuff White Mages Like. One online persona, a broad spectrum of personal facets. The Internet becomes a fully integrated part of social life, indistinguishable from the clothes on your back. That is a nutshell is the REAL Web 3.0. None of this hyper-bull.

So in short, so long, and thanks for all the fish! See you on the other side.

(side note, this was also my last Youtube video post as Boogiepanda in addition to being my last journal post to this Livejournal account. I did something different for this video. I had a transcript and used the PS3's Eye Create software to capture the video while teleprompting the transcript on the Wii Internet Channel. The result was a lot easier to edit, but turned out sounding more robotic than I would have liked. I plan on doing a more impromptu series of Youtube videos with the Borndigital account.)
[ Post A Comment||Link ]

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-09-22 23:51
Subject: (no subject)
Security: Public
It's been a long, but I guess productive day. I'm glad tomorrow is game night. For anyone in the general Raleigh/Knightdale area looking for something to do on Tuesday nights, I go to the Game Connection (In front of the Home Depot of Knightdale off 64 Business/Knightdale Blvd. map) to hang out and play board/card games.

I also go to the CATTG meetings on NCSU campus on Thursdays.

In addition to trying out a demo of "The Last Guy" and "Civilization Revolution" for PS3 this evening. I started working on research for one of my Board game ideas (my third game). It will be rather involved. The goal is to have a reasonably accurate map, such that the game will help re-enforce geography learning. My initial idea is to have roughly 150 board positions, but that may prove to be too involved. Another issue is consolidating the population data and transportation data I've collected, not to mention the population data I still need to get. The mechanics for this game are simple enough... it is just the board design that will be rather difficult.

If I get really frustrated with it I can always go back to the first game I designed. It has a really simple design, but the mechanics are too simple. It needs a theme to make it a little less abstract.

My second game is still in limbo. I like the mechanics, but need a new premise for the game. The original idea spun way out of control (hundreds of cards) so I need to come up with a simpler, but expandable premise.

And, I wanted to mention that I'm in the process of switching Live journal accounts. I've decided to retire "Boogiepanda" as an online identity. It was cute for a long time but it doesn't really reflect the direction I want to go. There is "baggage" from a number of things over the past few years that I want to sluff off. I have a new (and paid :D) account I'm setting up and I'll add the friends from this account. For the last few months I've been developing accounts on a variety of social sites that are better oriented to integrating my professional and personal life. I tried maintaining them as separate for a while, but it doesn't work well, and it doesn't really make sense. I'm not "getting rid" of this account so much as just putting it on the back burner. I still have a direction I'd like to go with this particular online identity, but it is all tied up in projects I don't have enough time for. I dropped IMVU recently and that is freeing up a lot of time for other things.

[ Post A Comment||Link ]

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-09-18 10:12
Subject: Fumbling Along
Security: Public
I think I was in a slump. Things seem to have gotten better. The main problem that persists is that we leave the house at 9ish (though it should be 8:30) and don't get home until close to 11 Tuesday-Friday. If I do anything other than the bare-minimum those days either it cuts into sleep time or I'm running late the next day (hence 9ish).

Sometimes I wonder if the whole 1 car decision was the most prudent, but really I don't think we can afford two cars just yet. Definitely don't need the hassle of an unreliable vehicle, I don't regret getting rid of the old death trap one bit. We certainly save on gas and mileage, even as compared to the previous carpooling arrangement.

I would seriously consider biking to work and riding home if we had a Greenway that connected to anything reasonably close. If they ever connect the scary #19 to #5 it might work. I refuse to ride a bike in car traffic for any considerable stretch.

I got the PS3 recently. I haven't bought any games for it yet. The one I want most (LittleBigPlanet) doesn't come out until next month. I'm borrowing Folklore from my friend Steven at the moment. It is a neat game... it just doesn't quite know what it is. It's one part 11th Hour, one part Ghostwisperer, one part Alice in Wonderland, and one part Pokemon. I don't like the comicbook-esque cut scenes. Those fall horribly flat, and it is apparent the intent was to save budget and development time on real cut scenes. Game play (mechanics) are good, but since it doesn't really do too well on focusing it does feel a bit lackluster. The controls are decent, no whining yet.

I'll probably buy Folklore if I can find a good used copy. I also think I might look into Lair, haven't read any reviews on it yet. Donnie wants Jeopardy, which is a decent looking download title, but I think we'll need another controller to play together so that will definitely have to wait until next month. Civilization Revolutions is another possible title, but we also have the Wii, so might wait until that version is also out to see which is better (even if just in the controls arena).

I am really enjoying being able to enjoy my high definition screen with games. The Wii just doesn't really output an impressive level of detail. We probably won't bother with Blue-ray discs any time soon. Netflix wants an extra $1 per month and I have yet to see anything I really want available in that format.
[ Post A Comment||Link ]

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-09-14 19:47
Subject: Another Post Already?
Security: Public
Maybe I have too much free time now that I'm refusing to work overtime... right.

Beat Final Fantasy XII finally. I am completely apathetic about that game. I can't say that I hated it, or even disliked it, but I also can't say that I am overly fond of it. Basic system and controls really were pretty good. Graphics, as always, were top notch. The character design was hit or miss, but mostly hit. Music had mostly great if not overly subdued qualities. The basic ideas behind the plot were even solid. The layer that brings it all together on the other hand... was crap.

The plot of the story itself is a little too interwoven, like a really tacky wicker chair. The party of 6 was stitched together like a quilt and I never quite bought the camaraderie... or even the character development. Over all it was a highly polished, unconvincing, wonderful, crap-shoot of an experience.

The playability didn't have any major flaws like some of the more recent Final Fantasies, but the story wasn't as lovable or even memorable.

It's like a cake that turns out flat. Just disappointing, even if it is edible with all that frosting on top.

In other news, PS3 price drop means I should have a shiny new toy by the end of the week :D
[ Post A Comment||Link ]

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-09-13 17:48
Subject: Failtube
Security: Public
I was really, REALLY excited to learn about the new annotations tool for Youtube. I'm not certain that it actually makes the videos accessible to screen readers (they have a captions feature for that, but requires external software), but it is a great first step. I also don't think it would be hard for them to convert annotation text into captions.

The end result is a video with pretty slick word balloons superimposed on the video (and they can be turned off). Unfortunately, the tool is just not there yet. It might be a good start, and I think having done it one and struggled for hours, YES HOURS, on a single albeit verbose 10 minute video that I can work around most of the quirks. The fact remains it was a total and utter pain. I'm also pretty sure there have been server issues with Youtube the past few days.

You're owned by Google, there is no excuse for poor performance. All Google has to do is sneeze and shiny new servers appear.

The end result is satisfying, but I really don't see myself doing it on ALL my videos any time soon until they work out a LOT of the kinks.

(and yes, this is a VERY old video. It predates my transition to married status and my move to library land.)

[ Post A Comment||Link ]

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-09-12 18:43
Subject: Gym
Security: Public
I've finally started going back to the gym. I have yet to make it twice in a week yet, but that is the goal. I'm going tonight once my food settles.

On the plus side I also have two nights a week for gaming, Tuesday at the store in Knightdale and Thursday with the club on campus. I don't know how in the world that is going to work out with me trying to work on personal projects but it beats me sinking all that time into work.

It will also be interesting to see how that works out with classes next semester if I am able to apply courses taken before I am accepted into either of the masters programs I'm looking towards the degree.

I went to orientation for the Equal Opportunity Institute yesterday. I'm under the impression that participation in that program is something one volunteers one self for... but there were a couple of people that acted like they needed to go back and take a Sensitivity 101 class first.
[ 3 Comments|Post A Comment||Link ]

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-08-14 09:58
Subject: Be cause THEY ARE (coming)
Security: Public
Some useful information for certain friends. This is your only warning.

[ 1 Comment|Post A Comment||Link ]

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-08-13 21:07
Subject: Feels kinda wrong. Like Jerry Springer, Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader Wrong.
Security: Public
[ 1 Comment|Post A Comment||Link ]

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-07-30 10:20
Subject: Dare I Say It?
Security: Public
Tags:masters career library
"Grad School", That long put off next step in my career path. Before coming to the library I had been eying Technical Writing and Industrial Engineering pretty heavily. I've gone back and forth about whether I wanted to consider a Library Science degree. My co-workers on both sides of the graduate degree fence have differing opinions. Librarians and non-librarians alike caution me with the whole, "Do you really want to be a librarian?" just as I was dissuaded from pursuing a masters in education by my past teachers and family in the education field. Others are generally enthusiastic.

I can also see the wheels of fate turning. I get the sense that by pursuing this degree I am going to set into motion a repeat of events that played out in this department in the past.

The field of options also seems rather limited. I could have sworn someone told me there was a library degree here at state that was more management focused, but I have not found it yet. It isn't in the list of ALA accredited programs, which is what I am told is most likely the criteria I want to go by. ECU will soon have an online degree option that should be ALA accredited, but I've been told that the program at UNCG is in danger of losing accreditation. I've heard mixed things about the program at NCCU, though they do offer an MIS that is ALA accredited and I think I would prefer an MIS to an MLS. The program at UNC is of course more prestigious, but they don't seem to have many if any online options and I've been told the demands of that degree would preclude me from working full time while pursuing it, not an option I have right now.

I definitely get the impression that if I am going to stay here (in the Library) long term, i.e. more than a couple of years, I am going to have to pursue a Library degree to keep my longer term career goals on track. Non-librarians are marginalized and while I don't really like that, the fact is it happens everywhere in pretty much all work environments. The criteria do varry. In Engineering any Masters degree would have been sufficient, but with only a bachelors my options were rather limited. In other places a bachelors is more than enough to avoid marginalization, but most of those environments are too stagnant for my tastes.

Another problem is the looming adoption. I don't mean to say that like I am dreading adopting, I really want it. The issue is finances and time. If I had to choose between the two, which it really seems like I would, then I would obviously choose the adoption. I just don't feel like my current situation would be conducive to providing enough financially, and pursuing a degree.

I also don't want to come across as trivializing the Librarian profession, but it really does seem like those masters programs would be more of a path of least resistance at this stage in my life. In either case I feel like I have discounted the Technical Writing option before I have even given it a chance, and I keep shying away from Industrial Engineering for some reason.

Tick Tock
[ 1 Comment|Post A Comment||Link ]

Boogie Panda
Date: 2008-07-08 22:00
Subject: Starting to crystalize
Security: Public
Tags:blog projects imvu littlebigplanet ffiv
So, I have a lot of things going on... in accordance with a previous observation I am working on simplifying my life a bit. I have cut some ties (but hopefully in no way have burned any bridges) with respect to some of my responsibilities with the IMVU community. I'm actually ramping UP with creating new products for that site. I still have the concerns that I vented in a previous post, but despite my issues (which is actually something I'm developing as a book idea) I still think that IMVU is a far superior attempt at virtual community as compared to things like Second Life. I really do want to pursue the book idea, but for now I'm shelving it because I need fewer projects in my life. Not more.

I'm going to try to get back to using this blog for my more right brained stuff. In general it seems like most of my boogiepanda accounts are better suited for this task, and as I find new sites I'll probably continue to use that account name for "personal" accounts.

While I don't actually like the concept of developing online "persona" because I feel like it is healthier psychologically to try to integrate one's different identities as much as possible, I am keeping separate accounts for more professionally driven and left brained work. There are just some people I would not add to a friends list on a social site if it was part of what I do for work. And yes, I have blog, twitter, facebook, skitch, and other accounts that are registered for professional sphere purposes :D

I like the freedom of having a personal account and a professional account. It is a shame they have t be separate things, but I guess that'll just have to be an "opportunity".

On the left brain side, I have a really bog code project that is almost at critical mass. There is one more (hopefully only one more) issue that I have come across lately that I have to work out and I'll be ready to start building. I've learned most of what I need to know to understand the Zend Framework, I'm getting re-acquainted with OO program practices, and I've done enough research in the other areas that ideas are starting to coagulate in my head.

Hopefully I can avoid another tangent. My left brained blog is going to focus on the professional projects, which I hope to keep to work hours plus two nights that I'm at work for car pooling reasons anyway. That leaves Monday night, Saturday, and two other nights a week for personal projects and hopefully (HOPEFULLY) I can devote Sunday to non-project time on a regular basis.

That last part will be hard.... I always have to be doing SOMETHING.

Oh, and amazingly enough I discovered there is someone I know that is actually MORE fanatically excited about the Final Fantasy IV remake for Nintento DS than I. In all fairness I feel the same way about Littlebigplanet on the inside that you felt about Final Fantasy when you banged the steering wheel like a maniac, but the key point is, I am keeping it all on the inside (ON THE INSIDE!!!!!!! OMGLITTLEBIGPLANETIWANTYOUNOOOOOOOOOOOOW)
[ 1 Comment|Post A Comment||Link ]